Hi, Dawn. Elizabeth said you were having a hard time of it. I guess there's no way this season can't be rough without your brother's presence. I can't even comprehend losing a sibling so close to me as your brother was to you. I hope that the pain of losing him will diminish, leaving you the continuing joy of his memory and influence.
I heard from Beth's post you lost your brother... I am so sorry for your loss and really hope you find some closure soon.
As I told Beth before, I don't subscribe to sympathy but rather empathy.
I haven't lost my sister in the physical term, but I did "Lose" her when I was 16... Maybe it was a part of growing up, but I don't think so ... and maybe it's hypocritical to be angry at her for tearing our family apart at that point ... but still, I don't think so. The sister I have now, might shed a tear about my difficulties but rather as a person to a person and not as a sister to a brother ... there is no sibling love any more ...
At any rate, I wanted to say I know how you feel ... even though I haven't lost the physical sister ...
I'm sorry for the loss of your brother. I do not grieve well and I don't know you very well, so I don't know what else I can say, except that I understand anniversaries like this are rough. I lost the most important person in my world two years ago in August and the whole late summer/early fall season is still very hard for me. I hope things get better for you soon.
HAHAHAHA! That was AWESOME! And ew, 'heads up'! *snort*
I, too, heard from Beth that it's a rough time for you. I'm sorry for your loss and, perhaps like Drake, have lost family members, not through death but in other very sad and painful ways... so I can only imagine how difficult it must be for you.
Also, I find I have mixed feelings about the impending 'holiday season', as I no longer celebrate Christmas due to both my distaste for the rampant commercialism but also the hypocrisy of SOME (not all!) Christians whom I've known. Since I have only my son, really, and he has Christmas with his father's side of the family, I often feel sad and alone around then, since my few friends are also busy with family, etc.
This will be the first year that I have had the pleasure of connecting with folks like Beth - and now you, too! - online and although we are far apart, I feel a true comfort in the wonderfully supportive friendships I am forging onine. I hope that you find that as well.
I've enjoyed reading your posts so far (even though I'm a new reader) and have enjoyed your smart, funny and wonderful comments on Beth's blog, too.
I was really sorry to hear about your brother's death when Elizabeth mentioned it on her blog. It must be really difficult for you with all kinds of grad school pressure on top of your grieving--November and December are always really stressful months for school, no matter what else is going on. Just wanted to let you know that lots of us are thinking about you and wishing you well.
Another person alerted by Elizabeth here. I'm not a frequent commenter so my name won't be familiar, but I wanted to say that I'm so sorry to hear about your brother and that you're feeling particularly bad about that right now. I am, however, glad to have found your blog - love the pirate hairclip! - and will keep reading around. Hope you feel better soon.
Hi Dawn, Beth sent me. I know how painful the feelings of loss can be. I am sorry sorry for your grief. I lost my dad and step-mom within a year of each other, and the pain is still so fresh. I am sorry that you have to go through that. I'm sure you have seen this poem, but I think I will repeat it here for you. It's one of my favorites. . Ascension And if I go, while you're still here... Know that I live on, vibrating to a different measure ---behind a thin veil you cannot see through. You will not see me, so you must have faith. I wait for the time when we can soar together again, ---both aware of each other. Until then, live your life to it's fullest. And when you need me, Just whisper my name in your heart, ...I will be there. Copyright 1987, Colleen Corah Hitchcock.
Everyone -- Thank you for all of your support! I'm again amazed at the kindness of Beth's faithful readers.
Yanub -- Last year was so hard to get into Christmas because it was only a month after he died. From last November I will have some sad moments for three months every year. November was when my brother died, then Christmas without my siblings, then January when my sister died (eight years ago this coming Jan.). It's a lot for me to deal with this year because I'm trying to get my dissertation prospectus finished while reworking a manuscript for submission AND reading for my General Exam on Jan. 16. But I do it because I want to, because I love it, and because I want to make them proud of me.
Drake -- I'm much more into empathy, too. I "lost" my sister, too, and was just finding her again when she died almost eight years ago. I had a lot of guilt to process after her death. Oh, and you'd love my dog even MORE in person. She's amazing, and training her gave me something to focus on outside myself after Stacy (my sis) died.
Veralidaine -- I'm the worst griever I know besides maybe my father. I'm sorry for your loss. If you ever want to talk, maybe we can help each other be good grievers.
Lisa -- I'm glad you "appreciated" my little pun. *wink* Your reasons for boycotting Christmas are valid for you, and I hope you never let anyone make you feel badly for it. It's sad that you can't spend Christmas with your son once in while. Could you and his father alternate -- you have him for Thanksgiving and Dad has him for Xmas one year, then the next year you switch? And I too am slowly forging friendships online, and they've been very rewarding. Comment more often, OK?
Nancy -- Thank you for commenting, and school pressures do indeed add to the stress (see my reply to Yanub above if you haven't already). But this, too, I shall survive!
schauspiele -- Sprechen Sie Deutch? I've seen you comment occasionally on Beth's blog. Thanks for reading here, too, and thank you for your thoughts. I don't blog as often or as prolifically or as wonderfully as Beth, but feel free to stick around.
Hey Dawn. I just came to comment on the naked people in this post and see everyone else's comments here.
I'm sorry for your loss. I know how really difficult it can be to celebrate the holidays when someone you love is missing from them. I'm wishing for you good memories of your brother, and whatever joy you and your family can find in the season.
On the naked Crippendales: Works for me! The name cracks me up!
Beth mentioned things are a little rough at the moment. Just popped by to say hello really. I don't have some great wisdom to pass on but I can still say hello and pass on my hope that things feel less raw soon.
You said to Yanub about wanting to make your sister and brother proud. I think you already are.
Kay -- Thank you for stopping by, and thank you for your wishes. I'm doing better, but next Wednesday (the anniversary) could be rough. Do you think we could convince the Crippendales to do a North America tour?
Cheryl -- Thanks, Sis. I appreciate it. Really.
Rachel -- Thank you. I hold kindness and genuine expression of concern to be at least as valuable as wisdom. I hope you're right about the sibs.
Wisdom is nice once in a while though. I'll settle for stringing a sentence together for now. Just about! ;o)
Will you do anything to mark the anniversary? My mom buys beautiful flowers on the anniversary of her moms death. It's a quiet and private gesture of remembering. And celebrating her life - remembering the good things.
Hope you don't mind me asking. Don't want to pry so don't answer if it's none of my business!
15 comments:
Hi, Dawn. Elizabeth said you were having a hard time of it. I guess there's no way this season can't be rough without your brother's presence. I can't even comprehend losing a sibling so close to me as your brother was to you. I hope that the pain of losing him will diminish, leaving you the continuing joy of his memory and influence.
Hi there dawn
I heard from Beth's post you lost your brother... I am so sorry for your loss and really hope you find some closure soon.
As I told Beth before, I don't subscribe to sympathy but rather empathy.
I haven't lost my sister in the physical term, but I did "Lose" her when I was 16... Maybe it was a part of growing up, but I don't think so ... and maybe it's hypocritical to be angry at her for tearing our family apart at that point ... but still, I don't think so. The sister I have now, might shed a tear about my difficulties but rather as a person to a person and not as a sister to a brother ... there is no sibling love any more ...
At any rate, I wanted to say I know how you feel ... even though I haven't lost the physical sister ...
Hugs and all of the best!
P.S. I love your dog!
Hi Dawn,
I'm sorry for the loss of your brother. I do not grieve well and I don't know you very well, so I don't know what else I can say, except that I understand anniversaries like this are rough. I lost the most important person in my world two years ago in August and the whole late summer/early fall season is still very hard for me. I hope things get better for you soon.
HAHAHAHA! That was AWESOME! And ew, 'heads up'! *snort*
I, too, heard from Beth that it's a rough time for you. I'm sorry for your loss and, perhaps like Drake, have lost family members, not through death but in other very sad and painful ways... so I can only imagine how difficult it must be for you.
Also, I find I have mixed feelings about the impending 'holiday season', as I no longer celebrate Christmas due to both my distaste for the rampant commercialism but also the hypocrisy of SOME (not all!) Christians whom I've known. Since I have only my son, really, and he has Christmas with his father's side of the family, I often feel sad and alone around then, since my few friends are also busy with family, etc.
This will be the first year that I have had the pleasure of connecting with folks like Beth - and now you, too! - online and although we are far apart, I feel a true comfort in the wonderfully supportive friendships I am forging onine. I hope that you find that as well.
I've enjoyed reading your posts so far (even though I'm a new reader) and have enjoyed your smart, funny and wonderful comments on Beth's blog, too.
Glad to know you virtually.
With hugs of support and friendship,
Lisa
I was really sorry to hear about your brother's death when Elizabeth mentioned it on her blog. It must be really difficult for you with all kinds of grad school pressure on top of your grieving--November and December are always really stressful months for school, no matter what else is going on. Just wanted to let you know that lots of us are thinking about you and wishing you well.
Hi Dawn,
Another person alerted by Elizabeth here. I'm not a frequent commenter so my name won't be familiar, but I wanted to say that I'm so sorry to hear about your brother and that you're feeling particularly bad about that right now. I am, however, glad to have found your blog - love the pirate hairclip! - and will keep reading around. Hope you feel better soon.
Hi Dawn,
Beth sent me. I know how painful the feelings of loss can be. I am sorry sorry for your grief. I lost my dad and step-mom within a year of each other, and the pain is still so fresh. I am sorry that you have to go through that.
I'm sure you have seen this poem, but I think I will repeat it here for you. It's one of my favorites.
.
Ascension
And if I go,
while you're still here...
Know that I live on,
vibrating to a different measure
---behind a thin veil you cannot see through.
You will not see me,
so you must have faith.
I wait for the time when we can soar together again,
---both aware of each other.
Until then, live your life to it's fullest.
And when you need me,
Just whisper my name in your heart,
...I will be there.
Copyright 1987, Colleen Corah Hitchcock.
Sending you hugs and caring.
Tammy
Everyone -- Thank you for all of your support! I'm again amazed at the kindness of Beth's faithful readers.
Yanub -- Last year was so hard to get into Christmas because it was only a month after he died. From last November I will have some sad moments for three months every year. November was when my brother died, then Christmas without my siblings, then January when my sister died (eight years ago this coming Jan.). It's a lot for me to deal with this year because I'm trying to get my dissertation prospectus finished while reworking a manuscript for submission AND reading for my General Exam on Jan. 16. But I do it because I want to, because I love it, and because I want to make them proud of me.
Drake -- I'm much more into empathy, too. I "lost" my sister, too, and was just finding her again when she died almost eight years ago. I had a lot of guilt to process after her death. Oh, and you'd love my dog even MORE in person. She's amazing, and training her gave me something to focus on outside myself after Stacy (my sis) died.
Veralidaine -- I'm the worst griever I know besides maybe my father. I'm sorry for your loss. If you ever want to talk, maybe we can help each other be good grievers.
Lisa -- I'm glad you "appreciated" my little pun. *wink* Your reasons for boycotting Christmas are valid for you, and I hope you never let anyone make you feel badly for it. It's sad that you can't spend Christmas with your son once in while. Could you and his father alternate -- you have him for Thanksgiving and Dad has him for Xmas one year, then the next year you switch? And I too am slowly forging friendships online, and they've been very rewarding. Comment more often, OK?
Nancy -- Thank you for commenting, and school pressures do indeed add to the stress (see my reply to Yanub above if you haven't already). But this, too, I shall survive!
schauspiele -- Sprechen Sie Deutch? I've seen you comment occasionally on Beth's blog. Thanks for reading here, too, and thank you for your thoughts. I don't blog as often or as prolifically or as wonderfully as Beth, but feel free to stick around.
Tammy -- Thank you for the poem, and thank you for your kind words. I'm sorry for the loss of your father and step-mother.
Hey Dawn. I just came to comment on the naked people in this post and see everyone else's comments here.
I'm sorry for your loss. I know how really difficult it can be to celebrate the holidays when someone you love is missing from them. I'm wishing for you good memories of your brother, and whatever joy you and your family can find in the season.
On the naked Crippendales: Works for me! The name cracks me up!
Hey Sis Dawn
I am sorry that you are hurting. Losing those we love is so hard. You have been in my thougths alot!
Hi Dawn
Beth mentioned things are a little rough at the moment. Just popped by to say hello really. I don't have some great wisdom to pass on but I can still say hello and pass on my hope that things feel less raw soon.
You said to Yanub about wanting to make your sister and brother proud. I think you already are.
Rachel
Kay -- Thank you for stopping by, and thank you for your wishes. I'm doing better, but next Wednesday (the anniversary) could be rough. Do you think we could convince the Crippendales to do a North America tour?
Cheryl -- Thanks, Sis. I appreciate it. Really.
Rachel -- Thank you. I hold kindness and genuine expression of concern to be at least as valuable as wisdom. I hope you're right about the sibs.
Dawn,
My hand is always there for you. You are not alone. I have some things to send you could you contact me at my email address on my blog.
Remember you are special too!
Laura
:o) Very well said.
Wisdom is nice once in a while though. I'll settle for stringing a sentence together for now. Just about! ;o)
Will you do anything to mark the anniversary? My mom buys beautiful flowers on the anniversary of her moms death. It's a quiet and private gesture of remembering. And celebrating her life - remembering the good things.
Hope you don't mind me asking. Don't want to pry so don't answer if it's none of my business!
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