I am so freaking tired today. Like, down in the bones, my brain hurts, my eyes are filled with sand tired. I have a book on bonobos sitting on the table, begging to be read, but it feels like even that would take too much energy. It's not like I've done anything to warrant being this tired. So, I was in my chair for eleven hours yesterday, but I was even starting to feel this way yesterday. So strange.
Sunday, January 30, 2011
Tuesday, January 25, 2011
Thursday, January 20, 2011
Roger Ebert Returns
I just read this brief story about Roger Ebert's new prosthetic face. Ebert has lost his lower jaw and his voice to cancer, and now he will be returning to the TV screen to provide movie critiques with a silicone prosthesis and a voice synthesizer. The above linked article has a picture of him with the prosthetic jaw, and this Esquire article shows him before the prosthesis and talks about his cancer battle.
Friday, January 7, 2011
The young disabled in nursing homes
This article was featured on Yahoo's homepage this morning. The major thing I don't like about the article is that it makes it sound as if PWDs under 65 living in nursing homes is a new phenomenon. What is true, though, is that it is a growing problem thanks to short-sighted, unempathetic, non-disabled politicians cutting funds to home health services in order to keep their ridiculously large paychecks intact. I'd love to challenge these fine individuals (she said sarcastically) to live in a rehabilitation facility -- nee nursing home -- for a month, relying completely on sometimes apathetic workers for every single need, even to give you one of your own cigarettes on a smoking schedule they determine. I don't think they'd make it two weeks.
What Adam Martin says at the end of the article is true: "It makes you feel old. If that's all you're around, that's what you become."
What Adam Martin says at the end of the article is true: "It makes you feel old. If that's all you're around, that's what you become."
Saturday, January 1, 2011
2010 in Review
As I lay in bed late last night (early this morning) listening to the fireworks and gunshots ringing in the new year, I was momentarily depressed as I realized I had spent more than half the year in rehab. I'd lost my entire summer and fall, and I'd spent my birthday and favorite holiday (Halloween) locked up. My poor, dear Moby suffered an early, untimely, and certainly undeserved demise at the hands of a careless young man.
My body, as though not experiencing enough physical challenges, was busted all to hell, resulting in me being pinned and plated and rodded to the point that I now have more hardware inside me than a Home Depot. I thought of all the rough things my friends have also gone through this year.
But suddenly I thought, "Wait. It's the first hour of a new year, and thinking of the negatives is not the way to start it." So instead, I started thinking about the good things that have happened in 2010, and suddenly I realized that even though so many bad things have happened, some pretty amazing things have happened, too.
March -- My cousin Josh and his wife Kyla welcomed the newest member of their family, Makynna Lynnlee. "Kenya" (a slip of one of her sisters' tongue) is Josh's fourth and Kyla's second.
March -- I was introduced to the group Great Big Sea ("from the tropical island of Newfoundland") via a concert my friend Lynlee took me to.
March -- My friends Jonikka and Erik were married on the Spring Equinox. I was the maid of honor.
April -- I received notification that I had been awarded one of the prestigious Ford Fellowships to help me complete my dissertation.
April? -- My friend Suzanne successfully completed her Ed.D. at UCSD.
May -- My friend Anita quit her job. You might think this would be a bad (maybe even a horrible) thing, but if you knew even half the s--- she had to put up with from her boss, you'd realize how fabulous this is.
June -- My cousin Amanda and her husband Jim welcomed the newest member of their family, Grace Ellen. She is Amanda's first and Jim's third.
July -- I got up in my chair for the first time in a month.
August -- I went with my folks to see Celtic Woman in concert. Fab. U. Lous.
August -- I celebrated my 39th birthday. Many people dread birthdays of this magnitude, but not me. According to the doctors in London who diagnosed me when I was 3, I wasn't supposed to live past 20. Every birthday since then has been a celebration.
October -- My fluctuating asymmetry review -- on which I'd been writing and rewriting for four years and had submitted to three journals -- was finally accepted for publication by Reviews in Fish Biology and Fisheries.
October -- I officially became eligible for the state program "Money Follows the Person" because I had been in rehab at least 90 days. This program automatically gets me paid attendant care at home when I finally escape this joint -- something I've been trying to get since I moved back to Kansas last December.
November -- My friend Marrus married her very own G.I. Joe (term used affectionately) in a "shotgun" wedding as Jay will be deployed very soon. You can see their custom cupcake topper and a picture of their gorgeous selves on Marrus's LJ.
November -- I got to go home for the first time in six months.
November -- My friend Amanda and her husband Roger welcomed the newest member of their family, Kaylynn Lee. Kay was a little early and experienced some respiratory issues, but to my knowledge she is now doing well. She is Amanda and Roger's first.
November -- My friend Anita successfully completed her masters thesis at WSU. She was so amazing.
December -- I was contacted by a masters student in the Philippines and a professor in Germany requesting copies of my review as their universities do not have subscriptions to that journal.
So now, my goals for the year. I really only have two major ones. First, I'm getting out of this rehab hell. Seven months is far too long for someone like me to be locked up, and it's time to go home. Second, I'm completing my Ph.D. It might take me until November, but you can put money on being able to call me Doctor Dawn no later than Christmas. Early notice to my New Orleans tribe -- you are hereby invited to my dissertation presentation and to my hooding at graduation, and we should start planning where to have my celebration. As to that last, there had better be fruity-rum drinks involved! To my biological family and to my Kansas pack -- anyone who wishes/is able to come to either the defense or the hooding is soooo welcome!
Finally, I'd like to thank everyone who has been so supportive of me over the last seven months. Your visits, calls, and emails have really helped keep me sane. I love you all, and I hope your 2011 is filled to overflowing with love, happiness, and blessings in your personal and professional endeavors.
My body, as though not experiencing enough physical challenges, was busted all to hell, resulting in me being pinned and plated and rodded to the point that I now have more hardware inside me than a Home Depot. I thought of all the rough things my friends have also gone through this year.
But suddenly I thought, "Wait. It's the first hour of a new year, and thinking of the negatives is not the way to start it." So instead, I started thinking about the good things that have happened in 2010, and suddenly I realized that even though so many bad things have happened, some pretty amazing things have happened, too.
March -- My cousin Josh and his wife Kyla welcomed the newest member of their family, Makynna Lynnlee. "Kenya" (a slip of one of her sisters' tongue) is Josh's fourth and Kyla's second.
March -- I was introduced to the group Great Big Sea ("from the tropical island of Newfoundland") via a concert my friend Lynlee took me to.
March -- My friends Jonikka and Erik were married on the Spring Equinox. I was the maid of honor.
April -- I received notification that I had been awarded one of the prestigious Ford Fellowships to help me complete my dissertation.
April? -- My friend Suzanne successfully completed her Ed.D. at UCSD.
May -- My friend Anita quit her job. You might think this would be a bad (maybe even a horrible) thing, but if you knew even half the s--- she had to put up with from her boss, you'd realize how fabulous this is.
June -- My cousin Amanda and her husband Jim welcomed the newest member of their family, Grace Ellen. She is Amanda's first and Jim's third.
July -- I got up in my chair for the first time in a month.
August -- I went with my folks to see Celtic Woman in concert. Fab. U. Lous.
August -- I celebrated my 39th birthday. Many people dread birthdays of this magnitude, but not me. According to the doctors in London who diagnosed me when I was 3, I wasn't supposed to live past 20. Every birthday since then has been a celebration.
October -- My fluctuating asymmetry review -- on which I'd been writing and rewriting for four years and had submitted to three journals -- was finally accepted for publication by Reviews in Fish Biology and Fisheries.
October -- I officially became eligible for the state program "Money Follows the Person" because I had been in rehab at least 90 days. This program automatically gets me paid attendant care at home when I finally escape this joint -- something I've been trying to get since I moved back to Kansas last December.
November -- My friend Marrus married her very own G.I. Joe (term used affectionately) in a "shotgun" wedding as Jay will be deployed very soon. You can see their custom cupcake topper and a picture of their gorgeous selves on Marrus's LJ.
November -- I got to go home for the first time in six months.
November -- My friend Amanda and her husband Roger welcomed the newest member of their family, Kaylynn Lee. Kay was a little early and experienced some respiratory issues, but to my knowledge she is now doing well. She is Amanda and Roger's first.
November -- My friend Anita successfully completed her masters thesis at WSU. She was so amazing.
December -- I was contacted by a masters student in the Philippines and a professor in Germany requesting copies of my review as their universities do not have subscriptions to that journal.
So now, my goals for the year. I really only have two major ones. First, I'm getting out of this rehab hell. Seven months is far too long for someone like me to be locked up, and it's time to go home. Second, I'm completing my Ph.D. It might take me until November, but you can put money on being able to call me Doctor Dawn no later than Christmas. Early notice to my New Orleans tribe -- you are hereby invited to my dissertation presentation and to my hooding at graduation, and we should start planning where to have my celebration. As to that last, there had better be fruity-rum drinks involved! To my biological family and to my Kansas pack -- anyone who wishes/is able to come to either the defense or the hooding is soooo welcome!
Finally, I'd like to thank everyone who has been so supportive of me over the last seven months. Your visits, calls, and emails have really helped keep me sane. I love you all, and I hope your 2011 is filled to overflowing with love, happiness, and blessings in your personal and professional endeavors.
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